Reaching Out Counseling, LLC
Childhood Behavioral Problems
Sexual Abuse of Children
Stress
Depression
Depression in Children
Teen Suicide
Drug Prevention
Nearly all children at some point disobey
their parents, fight, skip school or take a candy bar from the grocery store.
This is normal age-appropriate behavior. Excessive demonstration of these
behaviors, however, is a serious concern.
Common signs of behavior problems include:
excessive temper tantrums
continual refusal to comply with
school assignments
excessive use of aggression resulting
in the child’s failure to be accepted by friends
inability to socialize effectively
and be accepted into healthy peer relationships
An out of control child has a
disrupting effect on the entire family. Parents can become
frustrated, angry and emotionally
drained. Behavior problems in children may also lead
to severe social maladjustment in
adolescence and adulthood. The three categories of
behavioral problems are listed below.
Control Problems:
disobedience, high energy/activity, excessive crying,
complacency, temper tantrums,
enuresis (night-daytime wetting), encopresis (soiling).
Aggressive Behavior:
fighting, verbal attacks, threats, defiance, arguing,
cruelty, destruction of property at
home.
Delinquent
Behavior: truancy, stealing
vandalism, sexual misconduct,
drug/alcohol abuse, assault, running
away.
Parenting
plays a major role in the social development of a child. It’s important to
schedule quality parenting time and
guard against:
family
systems being compromised by our fast-paced society
an increased
tendency toward lack of family and community support.
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Sexual abuse of children by adults or by
older children is a wide spread problem. Recent studies suggest that as many as
40 million people, about one in six Americans, may have been sexually victimized
as children. Sexual abuse can happen to any child at any time, anywhere.
The majority of abusers are men; but
women may abuse children as well.
Abusers come from all age groups,
ethnic groups, and economic groups.
The majority of all abuses are
committed by someone the child knows and/or
trusts — a family member, relative, babysitter or neighbor.
Victims of sexual abuse could grow up
to sexually abuse children themselves
The abuser usually tries to control
the victim by coercion, using power of authority,
manipulation or bribing.
Effects vary depending on the
victim’s age, personality, and the type of incident.
A single minor incident like
exhibitionism, an obscene call, fondling, etc. may cause
temporary
emotional disturbances such as:
— embarrassment, fear, confusion
— guilt, anxiety, sense of rejection
— Distrust of adults, strangers
More severe situations including
incest and violent abuse may have long-lasting
effects such
as:
— behavioral problems including withdrawal, school problems, aggressive
behavior, running away, etc.
— psychological harm that can result in nightmares, extreme depression
or anxiety.
— physical harm including cuts and bruises, venereal disease and pregnancy.
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A
couple share a ride on a roller coaster. For one person
the ride is sheer delight. For the other, an experience that brings panic. These
two people have had different emotional and behavioral responses...or have they?
The biological response of both people has been almost identical. Both of
their hearts raced and their blood pressure soared. Hormones stimulated some
organs and depressed others. Their breathing quickened and their muscles tensed.
These are the Body’s basic biological reactions to stress. Predictably they are
always the same, whatever the stress— good or bad, welcome or unwelcome.
Stress is any situation that places extreme biological
or psychological demands on a person. While the biological response to stress is
always the same, the psychological response may vary widely.
A divorce is stressful — but so is a marriage. Getting
fired from a job is stressful — but so is getting a promotion. Stress belongs to
Everyone: business people, teachers, mothers, children, laborers, writers and
farmers. A keyed-up feeling is part of the unique tapestry of life.
Some stress is necessary to
well-being, and a lack thereof can be harmful.
Stress may not be as much a factor in
heart disease as many think.
Stress
definitely causes some serious ailments.
Severe stress makes people accident
prone.
Contemporary metropolitan stress
causes no more harm than old-fashioned
country stress.
Disastrous stress on a group often has beneficial after-effects.
Most people concern themselves with
the darker side of stress— distress. To be sure,
negative stress can be seen in the
housewife fighting shopping crowds, the university
student confronting a difficult exam,
the family facing a move to a distant community
or the employee laid off by a work
slowdown. These challenges are often complicated
by biological changes that may so
significantly alter body functioning as to lead to
disease.
Research in
psychosomatic medicine has shown stress can contribute to headaches,
ulcers, nervous system disorders, and
problems with the circulatory system and
reproductive organs.
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Question: What do the following people have in
common?
Abraham Lincoln, President
Franklin D. Roosevelt, President
F. Scott Fitzgerald, Author
Marilyn Monroe, Actress
“Buzz” Aldrin, Astronaut
Winston Churchill, Statesman
Henry David Thoreau, Philosopher
Vincent van Gogh, Artist
Ernest Hemingway, Author
Answer: Each struggled with depression — that gnawing feeling of being
overwhelmed.
Surveys among general medical practices show physicians spend between 50% to
70% of their time dealing with psychiatric problems. This same research shows
90% of the psychiatric complaints are associated with depression.
Depression has been something of a mystery since it was first identified in the
earliest writings of man. Since that time, researchers have markedly improved
the identification and treatment of those who experience depression. New
medications and the isolation of a previously unknown gene have spawned renewed
hope for a cure to what has been dubbed “the common cold of mental health.” At
the present time, however, depression continues to be the number one health
problem in the world.
Everyone has the “blues” sometimes and may become saddened by a disappointment
in love, some occupational set-back, feelings of guilt or financial worries. But
when apathy, dissatisfaction and unhappiness persist, the help of a professional
is essential.
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Billy, age 6, may look sad most of the time, may talk about feeling unloved and
spend most of the time in solitary play. He may be afraid to go to school, may
avoid trying new skills and respond with “I’m dumb,” or “I can’t.”
Susie, age 9, spends most of her time alone in her bedroom. She doesn’t
appear to care about anything. She avoids her peers, is failing school, and has
lost interest in personal grooming. She responds to parental concern with “I
can’t do anything right — I should be dead.”
Mike, age 12, is careless, reckless and refuses to follow family rules. He
ran away from home, punched a hole in the wall and is mean to his brother —
threatening to kill him. He’s always with his friends, skips school and has
begun experimenting with drugs or alcohol.
These children all have one thing in common — they are depressed. Depression
is a state of despair, helplessness and hopelessness. Depression can be turned
inwardly in the sense of guilt, rejection, self-hatred, avoidance and grief, or
outward with anger, defiance and aggression.
Common signs of depression in children include:
sadness
friendlessness
failure in school
loss of interest in activities
preoccupation with fantasy
sudden emotional outbursts
difficulty concentrating
suicidal statement
excessive blaming of others
easily agitated
overly accident prone
sleeplessness
Middle childhood, ages
6-12, is sometimes referred to as the stage of accomplishment.
Children are developing skills, identifying a sense of self,
learning to communicate
and socialize with peers. It is normal for children to
push limits, challenge parental
Authority, feel crushed with failure and struggle with peer
acceptance. There is
concern, however, when a child cannot communicate his/her
feelings.
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Suicide is now the second leading cause of
death among young people ages 15 to 24. Therefore, it is important to recognize
those teens at risk, know the warning signs of suicide and know how to help a
suicidal youth.
There is no one reason
why teenagers commit suicide, but most suicides and suicide
attempts are reactions to intense feelings of loneliness,
worthlessness, helplessness
and depression. The hopelessness that often leads to suicide
may result from a
combination of factors:
A recent
suicide in the family or of a close friend
Recent
losses, major disappointments or humiliation
Traumatic
events: death of a loved one, or divorce or separation of parents
Increased
exposure to violence and death in the media
Abuse of
alcohol or drugs: Prescribed anti-depressants, illegal drugs or steroids
Pressures to
succeed: academically, socially or religiously
Any of these events, or a combination of events, may trigger
depression or loneliness,
which in turn triggers suicidal thoughts and then attempts.
Although a
single, highly traumatic event can trigger suicide, young people thinking
about suicide almost always give signals, in advance, of what
they are contemplating.
These warning signs are a cry for help. The key to preventing
suicide lies in that ability
to recognize and respond to this cry.
Suicide Threats:
Some adolescents will make direct threats to commit
suicide. Always
take a suicide threat seriously and never dare the person to
actually do it. Others will
make less direct comments such as, “I might as well be dead,”
or “My family would be
better off if I were dead.”
Sudden Changes in School Behavior:
Be alert for signs such as abrupt changes in
attendance, dwindling academic performance, failure to
complete assignments, lack
of interest and increased irritability.
Sudden Changes in Personality,
Attitude, or Appearance: Be aware of the
shy
teenager who suddenly becomes a thrill-seeker or an outgoing
teen who suddenly
becomes shy and withdrawn. Pay attention to adolescents who
no longer care about
what they look like or their cleanliness.
Heavy Use of Alcohol or Drugs:
Adolescents who use drugs or alcohol experience
severe depression coming down from a “high” or out of a
hangover.
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Any of the following reasons may contribute
to kids turning to drugs:
for fun
because friends are
to make it through the day
unaware of effects
a role model uses drugs
to fit in
for risks
boredom
curiosity
Knowledge of drugs and their effect is the best possible prevention.
Education of youth and parents is necessary to help
counter the pressure
to use drugs. You can never have all the answers, but you should have enough
information to dispel the glamour of drugs. It is important to your children the
hazards of drug use. The following information is intended to aid you in talking
with your kids about drugs.
Most people try drugs or alcohol for the first time because someone they know
does.
We call this “peer pressure” and it plays a big part in our children’s lives.
There are signs that indicate possible drug usage. Knowing
these signs may help
you prevent further use. These signs include:
change in moods, becoming irritable,
secretive, and withdrawn
less responsible, dishonest, late
coming home
change of friends and/or lifestyles
defensive, difficult to communicate
with
loss of weight, unhealthy appearance,
difficulty concentrating
Communication is one of the most effective tools you can
use in helping your child
avoid drugs. Spending quality time talking with your child shows your child that
he
or she means a great deal to you.
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